Rejoice believers in Christ!! Is this not something to be heralded?
Last night God spoke to me!! He told me that he still love his children! You are not forgotten and don't lose faith!!!! He graciously told me the the end of times was soon!! He gave me a new list of rules to follow and great wisdom that I wrote down, it was amazing and like a constant epiphany to hear his true voice!!
I've written my own Gospel!! You'll all hear HIS great word soon! He told me so!!
God is good!
Ummmmm okay WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT? If I was this guys family I would be fucking worried because people like this tend to end up taking a fucking axe to their heads in the middle of the night because God turns out to be some demonic fucking dog telling them to "purify the world of sin" or some shit like that. Naturally this means that said nut job has to hack anyone and everyone who happens to be unlucky enough into tiny bit sized chunks.
And besides that I really fucking doubt that if God exists ( and I have serious doubts that there is a God but fuck it that's just my two cents on the issue) that they would waste their fucking time telling some insignificant butt wipe like this turd? I mean think about it let's say hypothetically that there is a God who created the entire fucking universe and every little thing in it. The universe last time I checked is pretty fucking huge and probably teeming full of aliens of every shape, size, and color. Why the fuck with all that going on would he/she/it talk to any one of us. That's like being in the middle of taking a shit but stopping everything to whisper poetry to a housefly........doesn't make any fucking sense.
And lastly if this was the case why the fuck are you wasting time telling people on Yahoo Answers who only want to find out what some celebrity shit head is doing, or asking stupid questions that they should know the answer to like "If I stick a fork in an electrical socket will I get a shocked? And will I get super powers from this?" NO YOU SHIT STAIN YOU WON'T GET SUPER FUCKING POWERS APART FROM BEING THE STUPIDEST FUCK ALIVE.
If this was true why the fuck isn't this sack of hammers on his way to the Vatican to tell the fucking pope?
The second was a comment posted today on a blog called Two Foul Mouthed Fuckers. Those of you who remember this blog will know that this was a joint blog between myself and CB ( The Crazy Brunette Chick ) who is no longer blogging. Because of this, that particular blog is now collecting Internet dust........well that was until today. I got a nice little email showing me that someone posted the following comment below;
ResCogitans said...
arrrgh!
you're = you are
your = possessive
x4 wrong in one post. wow.
sorry am a bit OCD grammar nazi and a bit pissed at mo :)
actually no i'm not sorry. if some asshole like me doesn't point out shit then how will people know what they are doing wrong!?
no really sorry. bye.
don't drink on an empty stomach.
ResCogitans...........what kind of retarded name is that to start with. Why the fuck before you comment you take a look at the archive to see that nothing has been posted on this site for months and that the post you commented on is from September of 2010. THIS IS A DEAD BLOG YOU FUCKING TWAT WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU WASTING TIME COMMENTING ON IT??
Also who the fuck are you to go off on small grammar errors, are you the fucking mythical spelling police? Either way shove it up your ass until you can taste the rainbow you fucking sperm dumpster I didn't give a shit if I miss used you're or you are or whatever the fuck. I think it's time you take a serious look at your priorities and refuckulate them to match the real world.
Do you not have something better to do then sit on your ass stuff Doritos down your throat and fucking bitch at me about a minor grammatical error. FUCK YOU, how about you go outside and have a life instead of sitting in your parents basement masturbating to pictures of He-Man, not the 80's movie He-Man starring Dolf Lundren or however you fucking spell his name either. No the animated cartoon He-Man. By the power of Greyskull you annoy the fuck out of me. You don't even deserve to be punched in the face, you deserve to be bitch slapped an spat on.
And that's all I have to say about that. Also don't forget to vote on who you think is the biggest douche bag. You have until April 10th to nominate who you think is the biggest douche bag . And if you haven't yet check out my latest video Robocop So Cold.
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10 comments:
There is a God and the comment you found about a new gospel and all that is wrong. It's all in the Bible. On another note,....I LOVE your new (to me) word-"refuckulate." I know this comment seems contrary but,....that's me. Peace.
I should have included the opening title to the original message Middle Child. The guy clearly stated that he thought God spoke to him directly. As for the existence of God I'm not convinced but I would never tell you or anyone else not to belive in it, who knows I could be wrong i'll admit that.
You can thank The Trailer Park Boys for the word refuckulate it's been stuck in my head ever since I saw that one episode.
Res cogitans means "a thinking thing" in Latin. The guy must think he's a philosopher in the tradition of Descartes. Posting comments correcting spelling errors on 6-month old blog posts is probably what gets him off.
Well if ResCogitans is so conscientious about grammar, then he should at least know that the first letter of the first word in every sentence should be capitalized. Also? "I" should be capitalized as well.
He's claiming he has OCD but he failed to notice his own errors. Fucking stupid.
Want me to hammer him?
I was wondering about that Gorilla Bananas if it was latin or not. He must not have anything better to do then go to dead blogs and complain about spelling errors.
Gnetch I did a spell check on his comment after I copied and pasted it on here and yeah there was a few errors in what he wrote so it's kinda like the pot calling the kettle black. Either way the guy needs a fucking life.
Silly grammar and punctuation nazis! Pointing out the trivial and posting a comment on a dead blog is about as rational as fuckin' a wall and eatin' a turd. I know what you mean about them. Who gives a shit about misspelled words or whatever. I read a blog for the content. It usually doesn't take a goddamn genius to figure what somebody means by a certain word, misspelled or otherwise.
The Gospel Goofball's self-made gospel sounds like it would be sorta humorous reading if you're particularly bored that day. I don't mind people who are religious, as I am in a less heavy kind of way, myself, but people who take it too far and make big dumbass proclamations like that are hopefully never taken seriously. If they are, it's time they be locked away for good, along with Gospel Goofball.
Love the super fuckin' hilarious post, dude. Take care, man.
Thanks Kelly yeah I think people need a hobby and or a life when they go fucking ape shit over a couple spelling and grammer errors. Who the fuck cares, even spell check gets it wrong from time to time.
As with religion I agree it's fine if you belive in that sort of thing but there's a line that shouldn't be crossed when it comes to either pushing those belifs on others or claiming that God talks to him like this guy did. Either way he's a fucking loon.
haha first time on this blog, after clicking a link on kelly's. i like it, but i got a bit of a surprise to find out i was famous!
what you say is true, the point of writing is to communicate and if that is achieved then who gives a fuck about the grammar or spelling? up to a point. if you don't know it's wrong then it doesn't interrupt the flow of reading something, if you do then it can.
i did admit i was drunk and an asshole (BTW cheers for quoting the whole thing, rather than selectively to make me out to be more of an asshole than i am). tbh i'd forgotten i'd posted it and i'm now quite happy at how coherent i was - i'd drunk a lot!
one last thing - you're black! :p
ResCogitans glad I could make you famous lol. I do agree with you up to a point when it comes to writing. If it's deffintly a problem such as screwing up a word or even a sentence so badly that it might as well be in another language and gibberish then I totally agree. However when you use spell checker and it misses that well then who cares.
Don't worry about the being drunk or an asshole it happens to us all and I've done more then my fair share of both, usually in public and usually resulting in some intoxicated version of Thunderdome.
Not sure what you mean by me being black. Last time I looked in the mirror I was white....well sorta white I'm half white half native american all Canadian to be exact.
you said:
...a few errors in what he wrote so it's kinda like the pot calling the kettle black.
but thanks for sharing your rich ethnic heritage :)
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