Tonight while I was working on the new website I decided to take a break and pop onto YouTube to check out some videos. Instead I got a nice little surprise waiting for me in a bed red box. No it wasn't a early Christmas present (I was hoping to find Lucy Liu under the tree this year) Instead it was a nice message from the jolly fuck sticks over at YouTube.
It seems in their wisdom and all knowing hypocritical bullshit they have outright banned my video to Zombie Strippers, saying that it contains pornographic material and doesn't meet the high standards of YouTube........ARE YOU FUCKING SHITTING ME. They ban my video yet you can watch the entire movie on their site which has tonnes of TITS, ASS, AND FULL FRONTAL FEMALE NUDITY WHILE THEY GRIND ON STRIPPER POLES. I mean fuck were talking about Jenna Jameson being in this movie for fucks sake.
When I made the video I cut out all the nudity, and just to be sure I went through the video several times, and there isn't a boob to be seen anywhere and yet I get banned FUCK YOU YOUTUBE YOU COCK EATING SHIT TURBINE.
Now I'm pissed but I do see the positive that has come out of this, first being that the video is still available to be watched. I uploaded it onto my website since my site provider Webstarts lets me upload my own videos and give me tonnes of space to do so. So if you want to see it here's the link http://www.therazors-edge.com/zombie_strippers_porn_star_dancing.html I'll also put the link on the side bar and I'll post a quick video with the link there as well. The only thing that sucks is that.
As for making and posting videos I'm still going to do it, those little shits ain't going to stop that, and if they ban future videos or my account I'll simply do what I did with this one, post it on my site and pass on the link. And I'm still going to post random videos from there because unlike those fucks who run the show I believe in sharing.
What do you get when you combine bad acting, the guy who played Freddy Kruger, a porn star, and the walking dead. Well you get one of the cheesiest zombie movies of all time, I movie so bad it's actually pretty fucking good. Yes I'm talking about Zombie Strippers which is what my latest video is to. I wanted to do something a little more twisted and funny for this video.
And yet again for reasons I don't get this video like my last one is currently banned in Germany, I swear The Hoff must be really pissed at me, I'm not exactly sure what I did to piss him off? Perhaps I should have responded quicker to the birthday card, maybe I should have accepted that cheese platter he wanted to give me, either way I don't get it. But getting back on topic I hope you enjoy the video and let me know what you think of it.
Being that Halloween is just around the corner I feel it's important to share some helpful tips to make this Halloween a safe and fun one for everyone.
1. DO NOT DRY HUMP THE ZOMBIES
Zombies may be the walking dead but they have feelings to........well maybe nobody really knows, it's hard to tell with their vacant stares and groaning. Besides you don't know where they've been.
2. DO NOT ACCEPT CANDY FROM STRANGERS
Unless of course they are in a clear plastic bag, you don't want some hobo's greasy hands sweating up all over the candy. This is especially true of chocolate.
3. IF BEING CHASED BY A CRAZY KNIFE WIELDING PSYCHO DON'T RUN UP THE FUCKING STAIRS
Really have you not seen any horror movies where the dumb blond with big boobs decides to make a run for it by going upstairs to hide in the bathroom only to be cut to little pieces with an axe. Not fucking smart, instead go in the basement instead cause nothing bad ever happens in a basement. Besides running up all those stairs means you'll just die tired.
4. DON'T SACRIFICE ANY VIRGINS TO THE DARK LORD
Unless you're knife is razor sharp, also make sure that you pronounce you're chanting right. You're sacrificing a virgin to the dark lord, not turning you're poker buddy into a giant furry chicken. I also have to point out that the dark lord is really disappointed from last years sacrifices from the lack of "actual" virgins. Seriously people do you're fucking homework, is it so fucking hard to get them to fill out a simple questionnaire. You don't want to piss off the dark lord.
5. DO NOT GO INTO THE WOODS ALONE
Bring a chubby kid with you, they don't run as fast. If the axe wielding psycho who just finished chopping the dumb blond mentioned before into human firewood decides to show up to turn you're head into a canoe. This way you can escape and as for the chubby kid..........well he should have fucking put the donuts down now shouldn't he. Seriously all that sugar and crap is just going to give you a heart attack.
6. IF YOU'RE A TWENTY SOMETHING PRETENDING TO BE A TEENAGER DO NOT RUN ANYONE OVER AFTER A WILD NIGHT OF PARTYING
We all know that you're shitty driving skills won't kill the poor sap (entirely at least) which means there going to come back looking for revenge. This also means that you're going to get hacked up with either a meat hook, meat cleaver, or some kind of sharp object with the word meat in it, either way it's not going to be pretty.
Don't be a fucktard and mix this up. Oh and on a side not if you have to deal with one of those sparkly gay Twilight vampires slap the bitch in the face.
8. REMEMBER TO CHECK YOU'RE AMMO
If you find yourself locked in a house with a horde of zombies trying to beat down you're door make sure you have enough ammunition to get the job done.
9.IF YOU'RE GOING TO EAT SOMEONES LIVER REMEMBER TO EAT IT WITH SOME FAVA BEANS AND A NICE CHIANTI
10. IF YOU'RE BUDDY IS POSSESSED BY DEMONS REMEMBER TO BRING AN OLD PRIEST AND A YOUNG PRIEST
I don't really know why but it sounds like a good idea
(Disclaimer: the above words of wisdom won't guarantee you're ass won't get cut, possessed, or eaten alive. So if the shit hits the fan, don't blame me)
