So many ass clowns so few words, It's time once again for me to tell you what I would love to say to the faces of famous people who piss me off with their bullshit antics and shenanigans. To see part 1 and part 2 click on the links.
1. The Cast Of Jersey Shore
If there was ever a fucking poster child for abortion it's this bunch of orange fuck tards. What the fuck is wrong with you people. I mean seriously here's your life story, some crack whore shat you out, and now you drink and party and pass STD's around like their fucking Halloween candy. And for fucks sack lay off the fucking tanning your in your twenties and you look like your in your 40's. It's because of shit heads like you that I want to buy a gun, a bottle of vodka and fucking end it. The only good thing about you you fucking turds is that the aliens will never invade because they saw your show, thought we were all as fucking retarded as you are and didn't want to catch a raging case of crabs from Snooki. And by the way Snooki you look like a fucking bridge troll, do you eat small children off camera under an overpass.
2. Tom Cruise
What the fuck happened to you. You went from Tog Gun to Scientology and jumping around like a pogo stick was shoved up your ass. Its a shame really, I enjoyed many of your movies. Top Gun for instance was a favorite of mine as a kid. Taps, a lesser known movie starting George C. Scott another fine movie. Fuck even you as a one handed one eyed NAZI in Valkyrie wasn't half bad. But apart from that you sir a fucking douche canoe of epic proportions. Let me break this down for you.............THERE ARE NO FUCKING ALIENS HIDING BEHIND THE SUN TO SAVE YOUR SORRY ASS YOU FUCKING DICK. Smarten the fuck up...........DIET COKE.
3. President Barrack Obama
What the fuck is this bullshit you want to tax Canadians who come to the U.S via air or sea, are you sniffing airplane glue you fucking twit. Let me see, now I'm not a financial fucking analyst who can refuckulate taxes like a motherfucker, but it doesn't seem like a smart idea to tax a country that provides so much money to begin with. That's like being a regular at a restaurant only to get charged an additional fee just because your a regular customer. Yeah your fucking smart numb nuts. If that's your best plan for getting the U.S out of it's current financial troubles you need to have you ass booted out of office faster then a fat kid running after an ice cream truck.
Who the fuck are you? Who the fuck cares? Please fuck off now........I'll give you a dollar.
5. Ben Mulroney (Son of former Canadian Prime Minister Brian Mulroney and host of ETalk daily)
You metro sexual bitch, I want to slap you in the face until you cry and pee yourself. First I hate your fucking dad for creating the GST (Government Sales Tax) and the fucking fiasco that was the free trade agreement. Yeah we became a stronger country out of it, but we got fucked hard in the process. For that shit I'm holding you personally responsible. Also I fucking hate your bullshit fake fucking smile that you plaster all over Canadian T.V, you fucking make me want to puke you fake bitch. Please do me a favour and see how many freight trains you can stop with your face.
6. Steven Tyler
Remind me If I ever see you and I have a teenage daughter to keep her the fuck away from you, your a fucking creepy perv. Seriously is that the only reason why you became a judge on American Idol, funny how the age limit dropped a couple years when you showed up, coincidence me thinks not. Sure you fronted Aerosmith which I think is a kick ass band, but your fucking ancient don't perv on teens it's fucking gross. Seriously you should fucking be watching reruns of Matlock and getting excited over a game of gin rummy not drooling over a 16 year old you fucking pervert. Can you even get it up anyway? You know what don't answer that the thought is disturbing enough in itself.
7. Ryan Seacrest
And speaking of American Idol you fucking shit eating grinning ass wipe. You just had to create all those other fucking visual disasters called reality T.V. You just had to fucking create a reality show around those oxygen thieves the Kardashians or however the fuck you spell their name. I would punch you in the throat but I don't want your panty waste germs on my hand. So instead I'd rather just spit on you because it's more degrading.
That's it for this one I would bitch out more but I need a sandwich and I think I have to poop.
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