Monday, July 26, 2010

Justin Bieber You're A Limp Dick Raging Homosexual, And Other Famous People I Want To Tell Off

Let’s be honest there are some dumb ass jerks out there. This also applies to famous people as they seem to have an above average abundance of T.V whores who would probably be willing to shave their balls with a cheese grater to become famous. Now I Know I’ll never have the opportunity to see many of these oxygen thieves, but if I did I would fucking love the opportunity to tell them what I think of their piss ant antics.

Here is what I would like to say to just a few of these fuckers

Lindsay Lohan

“Dear Miss Lohan, wow you are a fuck tard spoiled little bitch. I mean really grow the fuck up, YOU ARE NOT THE CENTER OF THE FUCKING UNIVERSE BITCH. Oh and by the way you’re prison stint is a fucking joke, if you went to a “real prison” like normal people your ass would get raped so many times you’d spend a month in a wheel chair SUCK IT UP PRINCESS.”

Mel Gibson

“Hey Mad Max…………..WHAT IS YOUR MAJOR MALFUNCTION NUMB NUTS…….didn’t mommy and daddy give you enough attention as a child? Seriously though what the fuck, you do all those movies, are more famous then God and you’re a total douche bag. Is it because you’re old and cranky and missed your re-runs or Perry Mason? Either way GO FUCK YOURSELF, oh and good luck trying to recover a career from your most recent fiasco”

Justin Bieber

“Dear Miss Bieber, It is miss right after all your do look like a girl. Perhaps you’re one of those he/she’s that are common in places like Thailand where I’m sure you would be very popular giving hand jobs in cheap run down bars to fat middle aged tourists. I’ve heard to date one of your songs YOU HAVE NO FUCKING TALENT YOU SISSY BITCH. Come back in ten years once you’ve “blossomed” into a young woman or whatever the fuck you are, or better yet just don’t come back. Now go away you’re stealing my oxygen.”

Jean Chrétien (Canadian prime minister from 1993 to 2003)

“Dear Mr. Crouton….Chauffeur or however I fucking pronounce you’re name….FUCK YOU. Way to go fuck head saving money by fucking over the military, disbanding the airborne regiment and forcing us to use shitty helicopters and sub standard gear. Your actions cost lives dips hit. Here’s a news flash militaries cost money, if you spend money the soldiers, sailors, and airmen have equipment that will get the job done and keep them alive and healthy so they can return to their families…….you know the ones that pay your ridiculous salary and pension. I hope you die a slow painful death ass pirate.”

Paris Hilton

“Wow a brainless slut how original. Let me see what exactly are you famous for? Oh yeah that’s right fucking some dude in a hotel room……..very classy. By the way you’re not that fucking hot either, you’re a skinny twig bitch who I’d rather punch in the face then get freaky with. I’m glad though I haven’t seen you much in the news, please keep up the good work and disappear forever.”

Jesse James (From Monster Garage not the outlaw, that one was cool)

“Gutentag herr James you fucking Nazi loving moron. Wow you fucked up royally, every guy and their dog would give their left nut sack for someone like Sandra Bullock and what do you do………YOU FUCK STRIPPERS AND SKANKS. What can I say other then YOU IS A RETARD FUCKFACE. By the way the Nazi’s lost, so your fantasy of the master race is just fucking dumb.”

To those that go on The Bachelor/Bachelorette

“Are you fucking kidding me… you think you’re going to find you’re “soul mate” on T.V. We all know it’s staged and fake as fuck. The show would have been called 20 something T.V sluts and a dude who are willing to degrade themselves on T.V to launch an acting career, but the Bachelor or Bachelorette sounds classier and more romantic (Yeah fucking gag). I would say more but you probably forgot because you’re too self absorbed with yourself……so go fuck yourself.”

There are lots more of these shit turbines who really get on my nerves but writing it all down would just give me a headache.

Random Hottie Of This Post

Giada De Laurentiis

Random Video Of This Post


Crazy Brunette said...

And what is wrong with being famous for fucking in a hotel room???? How the fuck do you think I got so goddamn popular?? I'll tell you what... It wasn't my cheerful fucking disposition!!!

The Wolf said...

Ah but CB there is a difference between being famous for fucking in a hotel room, after all many porn stars are famous for doing just that. And being a spoiled rotten air head bitch who is useless at pretty much everything and anything and who created a sex tape becuase she knew that would be the only way people would pay attention to her. She is the definition of an oxygen theif.

And what are you talking about you have a very cheerful fucking disposition ya fucker.

Dazee Dreamer said...

omg, I loved all of them.

Kelly said...

Of course, I agree with ya on all of these oxygen thieves. Anyone with a piss drop's worth of common sense would be able to see these worthless, untalented tramps and in Mel's case, retards, for who they really are. You've likely heard of Lindsay's nickname, "Firecrotch" before. If not, there ya go. Haha. That freckled, red haired skank is more famous for her drugged up, boozed up lifestyle than any "acting" or "singing" she's done.

Jesse James (the present one) is a sad little joke of a turd, for sure. Even sadder still, is that he broke Sandra Bullock's heart for the nazi skank whore. What a major retard!

Your descriptions on all the rest are accurate, too.

I can't say much about that past Canadian Prime Minister (because I don't know anything about him) but I'll take your word on his character... or lack of it. Any so called leader that would allow their men and women in the military to go without the proper defensive equipment, vehicles and gear necessary in order to survive should be thrown in the battlefield themselves to know first hand what it's like to try to survive without what is very necessary.

Well, by damned, I was going to write a post similar to this about two days from now (for real) but you beat me to it- so now I have to think of something else. Great minds think alike, I suppose :) A little later, I'm gonna do a post on the V. award and things not known about me... which will be hard to do because I think I've mentioned just about everything. Haha. Take care.

Dual Mom said...

My mother used to call Chretien "that gretchen fella that can't speak properly"....

Gnetch said...

Now that I've thought about it, accepting Bieber as a female is an insult to all females. So from now on, I will be referring to that fucker as "it." I have a little cousin who sounds like "it." But my cousin's 5 y/o so.... Yeah.

Also, about Paris, she only got famous because of a sex tape right? Oh! Also because she's rich, stupid, and talentless. Just like Kim Kardashian. You should include her on your list (unless you like her. Ooops!) :p

The Wolf said...

@ Dazee Dreamer glad you liked it I am to please :)

@ Kelly great minds do indeed. I say go ahead and write it, don't change it up just becuase I wrote something like this before you did. As for Lindsay Lohan I thought she was called "Firecrotch" becuase she had crabs.

And yeah Jesse James is probably the biggest retard alive for fucking around on Sandra Bullock. She is fucking awsome in all departments and deserves way better then a fucking scumbag like Jesse James.

@ Dual Mom I used to call him "Crooked Lips" or "Cock Jaws" he's got to be the worst prime minister this country has ever had.

@ Gnetch you know you're right from now I'll refer to him as "It" as well. As for Kim Kardashian I hate her fucking silicon infested guts. I was going to include her on my list as well as ones like Perez Hilton, George W. Bush, Osama Bin Laden, and Kim Jong Il, but my plan at the time was to do a part 2 so that this post wouldn't turn into a novel. But I think I'll post that one a little later. I have a funny story I was going to share first.

klahanie said...

I hear you on this one. It's just as bad over here in jolly old England. For instance, there's this talentless piss flap who is famous for having a boob job and being a total idiot. She went by the name of 'Jordan' (yes she is so fucking awesome they named a country after her). Her real name is Katie Price. She has a 'reality show' called 'What Katie Did Next'. Well guess what, Katie? I don't give a fucking rats ass what you did next! Oh and fucking hell, Paris Hilton keeps visiting Britain. Paris..fuck off!!!
Thanks, that feels better, now.

The Wolf said...

@ Klahanie I've heard of Jordan, I read the London sun from time to time. (The sunshine girls are also topless for those of you who didn't know). Yeah she's pretty useless, and her fake tits look like shit in my opinion. What I hope she does next is get hit by a train.

Jennifer Juniper said...

Amen!!!! The day Lindsay Lohan went to prison all the guys in my office insisted on watching the whole thing.. Please!! Can we work or watch the news?? Hell, soaps would be better!!

The Wolf said...

@ Jennifer Juniper I can't stand Lindsay Lohan, the whold spoiled bitch thing really pisses me off, especially since there are so many like that here in Vancouver. I really wish someone would slap her in the face and tell her to quit being a little princess bitch and shut the fuck up.

Anonymous said...

Who the hell is Justin Bieber? Was he in that all girls group Hanson?


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