Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Justin Bieber Your A Limp Dick Raging Homosexual And Other Famous People I Want To Tell Off Part 3

So many ass clowns so few words, It's time once again for me to tell you what I would love to say to the faces of famous people who piss me off with their bullshit antics and shenanigans. To see part 1 and part 2 click on the links.

1. The Cast Of Jersey Shore

If there was ever a fucking poster child for abortion it's this bunch of orange fuck tards. What the fuck is wrong with you people. I mean seriously here's your life story, some crack whore shat you out, and now you drink and party and pass STD's around like their fucking Halloween candy. And for fucks sack lay off the fucking tanning your in your twenties and you look like your in your 40's. It's because of shit heads like you that I want to buy a gun, a bottle of vodka and fucking end it. The only good thing about you you fucking turds is that the aliens will never invade because they saw your show, thought we were all as fucking retarded as you are and didn't want to catch a raging case of crabs from Snooki. And by the way Snooki you look like a fucking bridge troll, do you eat small children off camera under an overpass.

2. Tom Cruise

What the fuck happened to you. You went from Tog Gun to Scientology and jumping around like a pogo stick was shoved up your ass. Its a shame really, I enjoyed many of your movies. Top Gun for instance was a favorite of mine as a kid. Taps, a lesser known movie starting George C. Scott another fine movie. Fuck even you as a one handed one eyed NAZI in Valkyrie wasn't half bad. But apart from that you sir a fucking douche canoe of epic proportions. Let me break this down for you.............THERE ARE NO FUCKING ALIENS HIDING BEHIND THE SUN TO SAVE YOUR SORRY ASS YOU FUCKING DICK. Smarten the fuck up...........DIET COKE.

3. President Barrack Obama

What the fuck is this bullshit you want to tax Canadians who come to the U.S via air or sea, are you sniffing airplane glue you fucking twit. Let me see, now I'm not a financial fucking analyst who can refuckulate taxes like a motherfucker, but it doesn't seem like a smart idea to tax a country that provides so much money to begin with. That's like being a regular at a restaurant only to get charged an additional fee just because your a regular customer. Yeah your fucking smart numb nuts. If that's your best plan for getting the U.S out of it's current financial troubles you need to have you ass booted out of office faster then a fat kid running after an ice cream truck.

4. Keisha

Who the fuck are you? Who the fuck cares? Please fuck off now........I'll give you a dollar.

5. Ben Mulroney (Son of former Canadian Prime Minister Brian Mulroney and host of ETalk daily)

You metro sexual bitch, I want to slap you in the face until you cry and pee yourself. First I hate your fucking dad for creating the GST (Government Sales Tax) and the fucking fiasco that was the free trade agreement. Yeah we became a stronger country out of it, but we got fucked hard in the process. For that shit I'm holding you personally responsible. Also I fucking hate your bullshit fake fucking smile that you plaster all over Canadian T.V, you fucking make me want to puke you fake bitch. Please do me a favour and see how many freight trains you can stop with your face.

6. Steven Tyler

Remind me If I ever see you and I have a teenage daughter to keep her the fuck away from you, your a fucking creepy perv. Seriously is that the only reason why you became a judge on American Idol, funny how the age limit dropped a couple years when you showed up, coincidence me thinks not. Sure you fronted Aerosmith which I think is a kick ass band, but your fucking ancient don't perv on teens it's fucking gross. Seriously you should fucking be watching reruns of Matlock and getting excited over a game of gin rummy not drooling over a 16 year old you fucking pervert. Can you even get it up anyway? You know what don't answer that the thought is disturbing enough in itself.

7. Ryan Seacrest

And speaking of American Idol you fucking shit eating grinning ass wipe. You just had to create all those other fucking visual disasters called reality T.V. You just had to fucking create a reality show around those oxygen thieves the Kardashians or however the fuck you spell their name. I would punch you in the throat but I don't want your panty waste germs on my hand. So instead I'd rather just spit on you because it's more degrading.

That's it for this one I would bitch out more but I need a sandwich and I think I have to poop.

Random Hotti Of This Post

Jessica Alba

Random Video Of This Post


Gnetch said...

Ke$ha, I think, is the worst on the list. She really annoys the shit out of me. She annoys me more than (you ready to hear this?) Bustin Jieber!!!

Kelly said...

Hope your poop and sandwich went well, man. lol. Funny ass post! I feel the same way about those Reality TV vanity whores and butt droppings. And it seems like that dorky kid with the bangs is seen everywhere these days.

The Wolf said...

Apart from the fact that she looks like a sluttier version of Brittney Spears and sounds like a toad I have no idea who she is Gnetch.

It did Kelly it did indeed. And your right that little bitch is everywhere. That's why he must pay.

Max Evel said...

I heard the Bieber cut his hair .
He still looks like a tool .

The Wolf said...

It's kind of like that old saying Max Evel. You can dress up a turd but it's still a turd.

Autumnforest said...

Cast of Jersey Shore--when they are no longer having 15 minutes of fame, I propose we have them do public service announcements for why the citizens of New Jersey should practice BIRTH CONTROL!

Mad Jack said...

I confess, I have to get out a little more.

1. The Cast Of Jersey Shore
New Jersey (or Jersey) is a State and does, in fact, have a shore. Other than that I have no clue as to who or what you're talking about. I'll take your word for it though - if you say they suck pond scum, then they do.

2. Tom Cruise
Oh yeah, Top Gun and like that! I remember him, but that was before the Scientology shit happened. Look Wolf, Cruise would be okay if he just got his head straightened out. And I liked Taps as well.

3. President Barrack Obama
AKA The Anointed One
You are being far too nice to him.

4. Keisha
Don't know, don't wanna know, don't care that I don't know, and I wouldn't like he/she/it/them if I did know.

5. Ben Mulroney
Okay, see... we down here in the Land of the Free, Home of the Brave - well, bluntly, most of us don't know that Canada has a prime minister, let alone the Prime Minister's name, or the names of his children, grandchildren or favorite hunting dog.

And by the way Ace, if you think for one shit slurping second that the Canadians got fucked in the ass by the NAFTA business, you just move the fucking hell down here to the US. Take a hard look at Detroit, at the GM world headquarters downtown. I've been in that building and it's so empty you begin to wonder if you've entered some kind of Twilight Zone thing. For real. We got fucked; you just got hosed a little.

6. Steven Tyler
I don't know this guy either. I don't watch American Idol - it's drivel. I think I've got some Aerosmith music around somewhere...

7. Ryan Seacrest
Again, an unknown. What's with the unknowns?

Nice rant, by the way. It always does my heart good to read a nice rant.

The Wolf said...

Too true AutumnForest too true indeed.

Mad Jack no arguments here that you guys in the States got the shaft from NAFTA, I'm referring to it's earlier version that was between Canada and the U.S this was around the late 80's to early 90's when Brian Mulfucktard was in power. We got rapped hard by that one like prison sex type shit. When they included Mexico into the equasion I think it actually helped Canada, unfortunatly at the cost of the U.S.

As for the unkowns sadly these fucks are all over T.V which is another reason why I've pretty much given up on it and am eagerly awaiting the zombie apocalypse.

Mad Jack said...

Now that you mention it, I do remember the NAFTA beta version - US and Canada. At the time, I could not understand why Canada would want to enter into an agreement like that, as the Canadians would obviously be taking one for the team, sideways with a bucket of sand.

You know, that whole thing might have been an experiment. If Canada went too deep into the crapper to be retrieved in one generation, NAFTA 1.5 (Mexico) would have been failed and the funding moved into oriental massage parlors or medical marijuana or something.

The Wolf said...

Yeah we got raped hard prison style on the beta version. At the time most big companies such as BC Ferries and the CBC were government funded and sheltered. This meant that no matter how shitty they were run the government protected them. When NAFTA happened they were fucked because companies in the states were better and more competitive.

Forunatly we got our shit together up here and smartened up otherwise Canada would have been the 51st state.


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