Firebird

Vancouver seems to have more then it’s share of rich fuckers. These rich fuckers in tern have massive boats you could easily live in, condos that are multiple stories (Just saw one for sale that’s going for over 6 million with about 1500 square feet of balcony space alone……….FUCK), and scores of fancy fucking sports cars, SUV’s and other vehicles that cost way too much. On the average day just taking my friends dogs out for their walks I lose count of how many Porches, BMW’s, Audi, Mercedes, Jaguar, Lotus, Ferrari, Lamborghinis, and Mazaratis that go zooming about. Usually with either some old rich fucker and his “girlfriend” who’s several years younger, or some business type jerk jabbing away on a “crack berry” about stocks and some shit like that.


But the other day when out for an evening walk with the two dogs I saw something that made me do a double take, something that stood out like a sore thumb……….a 1975 Pontiac Firebird. Where the hell did this redneck cruiser come from? And in case you’re wondering it was in mint condition and sparkling clean, you could probably eat off the hood of this thing.

My jaw literally dropped when I saw this car parked in front of a restaurant along the seawall. Not because I have a particular fascination with Firebirds, Trans-Ams, Iroc-Z’s or Camero’s (They all look almost identical in the 70’s and 80’s), but because A. This car totally didn’t fit into the norm of what I’ve seen here in the last year and B. I haven’t seen one not only in mint condition but the last one I saw I was just a kid in high school.

Naturally I had to stop and give this car a look over, and I’ll be dammed another thing I haven’t seen in almost a decade………a cassette player. Fuck me a cassette player, people still use those, I don’t even see them at garage sales anymore let alone in a car. I immediately had visions of it’s owner a former 80’s stoner who still had a mullet, and who cruised the streets rockin out to White Snake or Poison on a mix tape. Or some redneck sportin a John Deere hat and a beer t-shirt going for a joy ride while listening to some Merl Haggard or Waylon Jennings. By the way I hate country music, all it is, is redneck noise about dog’s dying, cheating girlfriends, and trailers breaking down, with the occasional song about the working man and beer thrown into the mix. Apart from Johnny Cash (May God rest his soul) and Steve Earl (Because he’s a Nam vet who was in the shit) I don’t listen to any of it…..IT’S FUCKING DEPRESSING. Give me some Rammstein, Disturbed or anything from the 90’s that doesn’t involve a boy band and I’m in. But that’s getting off topic.

Anyways after about a minute of looking this car over I saw the owner, was it the former stoner with the mullet, or the redneck that I imagined would drive this car…….NOPE. It was a smoking hot Asian woman dressed in a black top and mini skirt and high heels. Now I was really fucking stumped, but liking what I saw none the less. I guess if there’s a point to my story it’s this, expect the unexpected.

And another thing that's completly off topic I put a button on my sidebar to my YouTube Channel if You want to see all the little video's I made.......no there not of me fuckers. I should have another one made soon. Also if you have an idea for one that you'd like me to make let me know.

Above is a 1975 Firebird. The one I saw looked identical except that it was black.

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Zhang Ziyi

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