To those of you younger ones who have no idea who I speak of I'm talking about David Fucking Hasselhoff, the guy who wore the wrangler jeans and big hair in the original Knight Rider series (The one with the talking car that wasn't Val Kilmer.......what a douche bag.) He was the guy with the hairy chest who was the mans man on Baywatch, the same show that made fellow canuck Pamela Hugetits Anderson (The one who sparked the whole celebrity sex tape thing). And in more recent history a former judge of America's Got Talent and has countless video's on YouTube of his drunken ramblings and eating floor burgers......mmmmm floor burger.
So to you Mr. Hasselhoff WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS MICKEY MOUSE SHIT? I don't get it why the hate? When have I bashed you, I don't think I've ever bashed you? I mean fuck dude I grew up on Knight Rider, and yeah I'll admit I watched the occasional episode of Baywatch......sure it was for the intro to watch the bouncing boobies, but hey what guy didn't get a kick out of that? Is it because you're singing sounds like a cat being raped by a chainsaw.....I can't help that you're music sucks and I think you even know that. I mean fuck I even had family fight for the Germans in World War 2 that shit has to count for something....right?
But I'm not the kind of guy to beg or plead, that's just not what I do, and if that's what you're hoping to hear to lift the ban you can get fucked. You may be " The Hoff " but I will fuck you up faster then a choir boy in prison who dropped the soap in the shower and has to run the gauntlet through the Aryan brotherhood. So lighten the fuck up and let the good German folk watch my videos.
Random Hottie Of This Post
Diane Kruger
Random Video Of This Post
And Because it had to be shown.......you know you want to see it.
12 comments:
I think we should have a special Hoff Friday.
Yeah, a celebration of Hoff. Me thinks Max is onto something there! Maybe not.
Why oh why should the good folks of Germany be denied your videos? I'll pop over to Germany and have a discreet word with the Hoff at his next 'singing' gig over there. Who knows, I might get real 'lucky' and get da man's autograph! Wow and gosh!
You know Max that's a dam fine idea, I might be able to do something about that. Who knows mabye that will get my videos unbanned in Germany.
Klahanie if you get an autograph from the Hoff protect it. Many have died trying to obtain such a thing as that. it's not as valuable as a Chuck Norris autograph but it's pretty close.
Do we need to imprison him in the torture chamber??
Gnetch you could try to imprison The Hoff but I'm afraid he would just seduce you with his rugged manliness. Better to let the man spend the rest of his days in a drunken mess eating cheesburgers off the floor.
The Hoff. Is there anyone on this good green Earth with more talent? Let's take a moment to bow our heads in prayer and contemplate the sheer awesomeness of this floor burger eating, multi-talented singing sensation and give thanks that he even allows us to cast our gaze toward him.
I farted.
The hell if I know why your videos are banned in Germany. Maybe it's all that sick ass midget porn ya got in 'em. Who knows?
Yes Kelly The Hoff is a god walking among us mere mortal folk. The whole midget porn thing could very well be the reason why Germans arn't all smiles and sunshine.
I'm going to shoot for it this Friday Wolf.
This will be interesting .
Anything for a laugh.
Should be interesting I'm going to do a "Hoff you Friday" not sure what exactly I'm going to do just yet for it though
Love that video.
Can I submit myself for random hottie? You let Gucci Mama do it.
Yes I did let Gucci Mama do it Papa K because she's well a SHE. I'm sure the ladies think you're just all that and a bag of chips but if I start plastering dudes on here.........well it just wouldn't feel right. Oh course if you're willing to undergo a certian procedure then I might consider it..........mabye.
I saw the Hoff on satellite TV and he looked like a pathetic, worn-out husk of a man. He's so zonked out he may have banned you by accident, just by pressing the wrong button.
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