Friday, November 5, 2010

Fuck You Friday And A New Award

Before I start this week's FUCK YOU FRIDAY I want to give a special shout out to Kelly and his blog Psycho Carnival for giving me the Lol Award, check out his blog if you're into funny twisted shit. If you're into lawn bowling or perhaps garden gnomes then this is not for you and you should promptly seek out someone to bitch slap you in the face until their hand hurts. Also being in the spirit of sharing I wanted to pass this nifty little nugget of an award to two blogs that I think are funnier then a moose dry humping a tourist, they are

Max Evel and his Underworld blog and the Dutchess of Dorkville and her drunken bathtub antics.

Now with all that taken care of here are my fuck yous for this week..........enjoy.

FUCK YOU to the asshole in the black BMW who almost ran me over AGAIN at the intersection of West Georgia and Denman Street. Really you can't drive without trying to send a fucking text message at the same time? And what the hell is with you turds in you're black BMW sports cars driving like giant douche bags....can somebody tell me what the fuck is going on, because it seems that every other day some ass clown in one of these cars wants to turn my ass into a hood ornament.

FUCK YOU to the senile old fucker who stopped in the middle of the parking lot and stared out into the great beyond while me and at least a half other people were either trying to enter or leave that parking lot. Stare all you want asshole you're not going to understand the universe any more then the rest of the talking fucking chimps on this little planet. How about you do us all a giant fucking favour AND PARK YOU'RE FUCKING CAR.

FUCK YOU to the greasy homeless hippie motherfucker who thought I was his personnel ATM. Really you looked younger then me, I'm not saying I'm old but fuck dude you're like what 18? First off why the fuck are you begging for change, you're not crippled, strung out on drugs, or have some kind of mental handicap other then being a complete fucking lazy ass. If you need money that fucking bad (which I'm sure you do because you smelt like piss and olives) the McDonald's just down the street is hiring. Who knows maybe you'll be promoted to the guy who operates the soft ice cream machine and you'll get to eat all the expired fish sandwiches. But don't come to me expecting a hand out, the only people I give hand outs to are the veterans selling poppy's for Remembrance day, or the guys with the bells looking for donations for the Salvation Army. And since you're neither of those FUCK OFF.

FUCK YOU to the creepy smelly fucker who ran up wanting to pet my dog. Do you honestly think I'm going to let some guy who smells like he shit himself touch my dog......FUCK THAT. My dog sleeps on my bed asshole and I don't want him to smell you.

FUCK YOU to the wobbly step ladder I was using to clean my windows. It's a long drop down those 12 stories onto the pavement and thanks to you're shitty made in whatever backward butt fuck third world country I dam near kissed that road. On the bright side I have been perfecting my swan dive technique.

FUCK YOU to Gordon Campbell B.C.'s now former premiere. Thank the gods you stepped down you are a joke, oh and thanks for forcing us to now pay the new HST (harmonized sales tax) A tax I might add is not only messed up on paper but has almost zero support from taxpayers, business, and a good deal of those in the government, yet you rammed this shit down our throats. Thank you for continuing the long standing tradition of fucking the province over and making it just that much harder for honest people to live here without having to work two or more jobs, and for making it more undesirable for business to establish themselves here. Awesome job douche bag, I personally love how you are now the most hated Canadian politician since Canada became a country, pat yourself on the back for that one.

FUCK YOU to those little green alien bastards. Why the fuck have you not come down to beam me up to take me to you're home world and declare me you're new leader. Do I have to send you a fucking resume too assholes...........and do you even have email? I mean yeah sure you invented interplanetary space travel, but you don't even have an x-box, I've heard all you have is fucking table tennis and checkers. WHO THE FUCK PLAYS CHECKERS THESE DAYS? 

And that's all I have to say on that.

Random Hottie Of This Post

Gillian Anderson

Random Video Of This Post

9 comments:

Max Evel said...

Thanks for the Shout Out Wolf .
:-)

klahanie said...

Hey Wolf,
Well, holy fuck, I heard from my mother, this morning, that Gordon Campbell, had stepped down, or stepped into some cat shit. This might surprise you, probably not, but over in England, if it aint American stuff, we don't get to hear about it. That HST is a fucking nightmare.
Congrats on the award and to those you passed it onto. Now, you make sure you keep it nice and shiny and place it in your trophy cabinet.
Hope you have a somewhat reasonable weekend in Vancouver.
Take care, Gary

Gnetch said...

You fell from a ladder? Ow! You okay???

The Wolf said...

No worries Max Evel

Klahanie I damm near started dancing in the the street when I heard that fat fuck stepped down. It's because of assholes like that, that I never vote liberal.

Gnetch no if I did I would have been dead, I would have probably fallen 12 stories down. It was just really shitty and wobbled alot when I was standing on it. Because of that I almost fell over.

Kelly said...

Hey wolf, you're most welcome on the award and thanks for the shout out, man. That's true... If you're into knocking down garden gnomes with your bowling ball, then my site ain't for the freaks out there.

Maybe you should have whacked that 18 year old homeless dude who smelt of piss and olives with a hockey stick to knock some sense into him. Anybody that young and without any handicaps shouldn't be asking for handouts.

Those little green alien bastards haven't picked you up yet because they're insulted that you have a tin foil hat collection. They're pissed that they're unable to read your mind or put some freaky alien sex imagery in your head.

That's what they told me, anyway.

The Wolf said...

Kelly that explains everything, I was wondering why I had a strange craving for skittles and alien chicks who were blue and green. Tell those fuckers to send me an email so I know it's them and not the government.

A Daft Scots Lass said...

Love your random hotty.

The Wolf said...

It's not because she's a red head like yourself now is it? ;)

Dutchess said...

Thanks for the award Wolfie dear. Glad you didn't kiss the pavement, where would the blogosphere be without you? And? Never trust those green alien bastards.

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