Monday, May 3, 2010

Fuck I Hate Wall-Mart

Today I had to take a little drive over to the North shore to run some errands, this usually means having to grab a few things at that oh so wonderful cesspool of human indignity that is Wall-Mart. Personally I fucking hate the place, every time I go inside the place is packed full of broken souls and people who look like they could be extras from the movie Deliverance (Squeal like a pig for me), but hey their shit is cheap and last time I checked money doesn’t grow out of my ass………….if it did that would be interesting. Anyways back to my little misadventure.

So I get there and start getting all the things I need, you know stuff like toilet paper and all that fun stuff. Now I get to the men’s section where they keep the razors blades, and razor blade related products. If you’re familiar with Wall-Mart you know that the razors blades are usually behind a locked glass case, and like usual there is no fucking attendant within a mile. So as usual instead of waiting there with a thumb up my ass like many people I went to track one down. After a couple minutes I find one and get her to open up the case to get my goodies. My hands were full so I simply stuck out my basket and asked her to drop it inside. This is where the bullshit begins. She smugly laughs and tells me that I have to go to the service counter to pay for those and that she has to escort me there…………wtf. Seriously these are fucking razor blades (Mach 3 to be specific) what the fuck does she expect I’m going to do with them, take down a fucking jumbo jet perhaps? Maybe I’ll do some drive by shavings with them, I mean come on there fucking disposable razors blades, yet these things get more security then the propane tanks which are sitting outside in an unlocked metal cage, something which can be used as an explosive!

Grumbling I go to the service counter where I’m greeted by an old lady who looks a lot like Yoda, and her supervisor this fat blonde useless bitch who was too busy chewing bubbly gum and scratching her ass to do any actual work. After a couple minutes Yoda starts scanning my items, I politely say to her “Mamm I have some razors blades to pick up as well”. To which she looked up at me and with a very Yoda like expression on her face simply said “Eh???”. I asked her again, and she responded the same with only more confused, perhaps contemplating the vices of the dark side of the force. I asked again this time louder in a military esque tone to get her attention, still nothing; all the while fat blonde cunt is off in space. I look at her and say “I’m sorry are you too fucking good to do you’re job, how bout get over here and ring this through before the second coming of Christ please” (I’m Canadian even pissed we still use manners)

My question is this why the fuck do razors blades need so much security when there one of the cheapest things in the store, and if I wanted to buy them to cause harm I could go to a dozen different places to buy them without the bullshit. Second if there is going to be that much security why then do the dumbest fucking supervisor in the entire store have any part of it. And third why the fuck is it that every time I go outside I have to run into these stunned fucks? Why can’t I do my day to day thing and run into say…..un-fucked people, is that too much to ask? Is there a god I should sacrifice some small farm animals to for this to happen?

But I’m not bitter :)

 
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3 comments:

Kelly said...

That's fucking ridiculous. Your right. They're not really weapons. Even our Wal-Mart, chock full of dumbasses, don't have the disposable razor blades locked in a case like yours does. Our store has the electric razors (which cost quite a bit here) inside a case but that's understandable- sort of.

Sounds like Yoda could have used a punch to the throat. And being a Wal-Mart "associate" (fancy, stupid title for a regular employee) many years ago, I know if you had complained to upper managment about their lack of enthusiasm and common sense, nothing would have been done about it.

Wal-Mart doesn't care about their customers or employees (sorry... I meant associates). :-) They think they're too big a corporation and have the monopoly over most businesses to give a fuck or care. My wife, who works at ours, could tell you horror stories about that place and their unfair policies and the way they handle the customers when they complain. Unfortunately, the turnover count of employees getting hired, fired and quitting is so high that you'll usually be interacting with some numb nuts who has only been at Wal-Mart for a week, doesn't know what's going on, doesn't care and plans on quitting in the next 2 days for that higher paying job at McDonald's, flipping burgers.

Rant is over. Now go in peace. :-)

The Wolf said...

It sounds like Wal-Mart is a wonderful place to work at, and by wonderful I mean I would rather cut my testicles off with a rusty spoon before I fill out an application form and that's including the fact that I'm currently looking for work. The only reason why I go there is becuase many other stores are more expensive and saving money is paramount. Now McDonald's thats where all the cool kids hang out.

Kelly said...

Yeah, that's the same reason I go to Wal-Mart. I hate that. Unfortunately, it's cheaper than anywhere else in my small town, too. My wife and I also get a small 10% discount off non-grocery items because she works there. That's only a big deal when you're buying a high priced item, like a TV or whatever. Wal-Mart has made itself the only game in our town and many others by being the monopoly and, in our case, by bribing our city council into keeping it that way. Other big name stores (Target, Meijer's and so on) have tried to come here and set up shop, so to speak, but our city council won't allow it.

I could write a book about how bad Wally World is, but it's bad enough that I had to live through it than try to look back on my time there and sort of re-live it all again in my head and write about it.

McDonald's is where all the cool kids hang out? Hahahaha. Yeah, same here. Hope you find a job soon. Don't cut your nuts off with a rusty spoon. You might need 'em later. LOL.

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