Wednesday, September 1, 2010

People Actually Use These To Find My Blog ?

It's been awhile since I last checked how this blog is doing on Google Analytics, and I'm curious to know how everyone who STALKS ME follows me and reads this blog and what they use to find it. Now from time to time I've seen other people's lists and I've come to this conclusion THE PEOPLE WHO INVENTED ANALYTICS ARE SMOKING FUCKING CRACK......yup I fucking said it crack.

So I thought I would share with you all the wonderful search terms people have used to find this blog;

"Cock Jawed" Hmmm okay I guess whatever floats you're boat buddy.

snafu what the fuck is that Wow you're A COMPLETE FUCKING MORON confused about what this means. It means (In case you don't know this by now) Situation Normal All Fucked Up.....kinda like that homeless guy who offers hand jobs behind the dumpster for cigarettes.

 fuckingkids yes they are

megan pickle crazy Who the fuck is Megan ?

midget fucking blogspot I'm sure that would be a big hit in Mexico

what does "take no shit or prisoners" mean? If I need to explain this to you I'll find you a large Q-Tip to give yourself a frontal lobotomy

why are women in vancouver such stuck up bitches Now isn't that a good question

kelly hrudey should get kicked in the junk Yes indeed that sack of fat deserves just that

kelly hrudey is a donkey raping shit eater Sure I'll buy that

In case you don't know who Kelly Hrudey is he is a commentator on Hockey Night In Canada and a former goaltender for the Los Angeles Kings back in the 90's. Personally I hate the fucker because he changes his opinion in mid sentence and talks out his ass while having meat sweats from eating 12 cheeseburgers before the show.

mr limpdik Speak for yourself asshole

captain kirk two handed punch ?????????

vancouver gay escorts Really??? What the fuck is this shit??

But the number one keyword that constantly pops up is don't turn this rape into a murder. Every day I get a couple of hits using that term or something close to it such as;

bitch don't turn this rape into a murder

turn me into a murderer

rape and murder

don't turn this murder into a rape

Are you fucking kidding me, so I Googled it. And guess where I sit out of 5,750,000 results......NUMBER FUCKING ONE. Well isn't that just peachy, I mean I knew I would eventually be number one of something just not this. Seriously though how many sick fucks are out there looking for advice on how to rape and murder and get rid of the evidence afterwards. So I did some simple math......by the way I suck at math.

Here it goes if the average who use that term is 2 per day that's about 30 a month. That translates into about 720 a year give or take a few, 720 a year translates into a lot of sick fucks out there. And that's not including any increase in traffic, just at where it sits now. This ultimately brings me to my next point WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE?

I'm confused my head hurts and I need to poop.

Random Hottie Of This Post


Christina Ricci

Random Video Of This Post

12 comments:

Babes Mami said...

My main ones are vajazzling, babes, red headed babes. Way to be the number one for murder rape lol

Gnetch said...

I don't know what's wrong with people. So the common keywords that lead to your blog are rape and murder. Mine are drunk, fuck, and forgetful. Also, PMS. These would make a good story, I think.

-MissC* said...

My main one is The Devil is Horny and Flaming. lol Go figure!

Echo Phyber said...

A lot of bad tags on mine also.

Gucci Mama said...

Mine are "Why can't I own a Canadian", "Gucci Mama is a bitch", and "Mama wears pink panties" or some variation of those. I try not to dwell on it.

The Wolf said...

@ Babes Mami vajazzling lol too funny I have got to figure out how to use that in a sentence.

@ Gnetch we should combine out keywords to make a story....now that would be a good story......sorta

@ MissC that's hilarious I wish I had that one

@ Echo Phyber c'mon share them it's the first step after all. Not sure what the first step goes to though

@ Gucci Mama hmmm pink panties eh......sorry that's all I saw of you're comment :)

Max Evel said...

ANALYTICS... is ANAL .
Seriously, I used to care if people are looking ,and I think I have got to a point of not giving a damn.
I just do my shit for my own enjoyment,
but yes it's weird what keywords are you used to find you,me,and others.

The Wolf said...

Anal is right Max Evel and very fucking retarted as well. Like dealing with some of the idiots up here it leaves me scratchng my head in confusion with the urge to take a shit

Amy J - Book Addict said...

Okay I am going to have to go check mine now! LMAO
These are hilarious.

The Wolf said...

@ Amy J when you do let me know what results you get it seems everyone gets some pretty messed up ones

Echo Phyber said...

I lied. I do not have google analytics. Sorry, I am a pathological liar.

The Lady's Lounge said...

If it's any consolation at all, the people who find my blog are most often searching labia lounge, wankerhut, show me your boobs and stray cats humping.
Yeah...

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